Monday, February 28, 2005

Politics and the Oscars

I promised myself that since everyone else and their mom write about the oscars, I was going to let this one go, but after watching the show last night with some of the raucous EA crew, I couldn't resist. This blog is supposed to be about politics, but what more appropriate focusing point of all things political then the Academy Awards, right? I have to say I actually enjoyed the show this year, maybe because we filled in the snooze parts with our own banter ripping apart whichever Hollywood figure they cut too, but nonetheless. Scotty and I tied on our picks sheet, so no bragging rights for anyone this year. I haven't been able to listen to the radio talk shows today, but I'm sure the waves are in a frenzy about the hated Hollywood and their spectacle. They have plenty of ammunition, Chris Rock slamming Dubya while propping Moore, and apparently the now pro-euthanasia Million Dollar Baby winning best picture while Passion got the snub, if Jesus can't win a gold statue, Hollywood must be the root of all evil. Anyways, here are my gold stars and middle fingers for the evening: *CHRIS ROCK: (gold star) I thought Rock did a great job, whether the whole "is he going drop f-bombs" hype was a marketing thing or the work of actual concerned groups, Rock is a professional comedian, who put on a great show, I thought. The line about Jeremy Irons being a comedic genius was classic! *COUNTING CROWS GUITARIST: (gold star) not for the lame song, but for the "I LOVE SCARLETT" t-shirt he was wearing. What a great pick up move, hope it worked out at the after parties. *HILARY SWANK: (middle finger) for not only beating out Kate Winslett, but also for reminding us again that she grew up in trailer. But (gold star) for making Scott laugh harder than I've ever seen him laugh with the trailer line, because minutes earlier we finally pinpointed her accent as being not "southern" so much as "trailer park". *SEAN PENN: (middle finger) for just plain being an asshole. God forbid Rock actually take some fun shots at some of those in the acting community, don't take it so personally next time, Jude Law will get over it, I'm sure. *OSCAR PRODUCERS: (middle fingers all around) for a number of things, one being terribly blatant cut aways the whole night, "the motorcyle diaries song is playing quick cut to some of the well known Hispanic actors". And why did I see more than one cutaway of Jay-Z and P. Diddy? Unacceptable. Also, hitting the three hour mark was nice I must say, but making every award that wasn't in the top 8 categories feel like the handing out of participation ribbons at the end of your sixth grade YMCA basketball league, not cool. It's only documentaries, who cares about those, we couldn't cut down the commercial times at all could we? *JAMIE FOXX: (gold star) yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, but come on that was good stuff. *SOUND MIXING AWARD: I don't know what to give this, because I almost would rather watch the technical achievement awards anyway, which is where this award belongs. Sound editing, okay, I understand, but I've done my share of sound mixing, it sucks, its hard, I know, but so is being a PA. When will they move this category where it belongs, and spend some more time on, oh I don't know, documentaries or something.

I heard somewhere that stuntmen and stuntwomen are pushing for their own category. Which leads me to my question, what would be the funnest new category at the oscars?
Can you imagine the acceptance speech for the best Production Assistant.

"I'd like to thank all the people who stepped on me and allowed me to bring them coffee, and a special thanks to Hilary Swank for remembering her roots as a nobody and never making eye contact."
Damn, beaten to the punch. Best PA award would be bomb. But only if you got the most pompous wannabes to be nominated (the kind that would strut around with their best PA award). Strange you don't see that during a program that is Hollywood patting itself on the back...

P.S. Didn't see M$B yet, Dan. Thanks for the spoiler. Next thing you're going to tell me is Soylent Green is people and that the cripple was Kayser Soze.

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